Last year, tickets only sold out just before the Burn. The STEPs that BMorg have taken this year, have guaranteed that the event has more than sold out before the Burnal Equinox, leaving them in charge of the World’s Biggest Guest List. Now nobody can get in, even though we have no idea who or what is actually inside. All we know is that the queue to get in goes round the block. It’s “members only”, even though no memberships have ever been sold in 25 years. It’s like the bouncers and door bitch have changed and none of the regulars who make the club are recognized, so they get sent to the back of the line.

G4TV interview with Burner Alyssa

It seems like it’s not so easy to get on their list. Writer, sex educator and Burner Alyssa came to their assistance in their time of greatest crisis with free PR advice, Maid Marian said they were “consulting with widely read blogs”. The widely-read blog led to more free TV advertising for Burning Man, also thanks to Alyssa.

But all that volunteer assistance was not enough for her to get the nod – she had to fill out an application for her camp, stating clearly where everyone’s RVs and tents and shade structures would be. How is that even possible, when only 3 out of 20 from her camp have tickets? Is this a cruelly ironic joke? Bureaucracy gone unchecked? Or just a case of no good deed gets left unpunished? Alyssa if you’re reading, I would love to see a copy of the application form.

The entertainment on the other side of the velvet rope is clouded in mystery and secrecy.

Those of you with tickets, who are waiting in line, have no idea if any of the cool people will be inside. No-one knows if any DJs or other live entertainment will be there at all. Will it be your friends, a great bunch of new friends to meet, or wall to wall this…

In one way, it doesn’t matter. Like a club in Miami or St Tropez, Burning Man has become a sufficiently big name now that just to get in is enough.

I personally hate waiting in line to get in a club. I would rather book a table and not have to deal with the riff-raff. Perhaps that is against BMOrg’s principles, but it’s the way that many Burners roll. It can cost big bucks to throw down at Burning Man, there are a lot of RVs, there are 700 art cars, there are a lot of Burners who aren’t afraid to spend money. So why the bleating about “Burner Principles” and scalpers? A ticket on Stubhub for Burning Man 2012 is cheaper than a table at Pacha, bypasses the line and the guest list, and guarantees you entry – you might not even have to wait in line at the Will Call to get in.

With a line like this out the front of their club, if the BLM does give them the nod for another 50,000 tickets, they should move them in no time.