Hard to believe, this crazy cowboy tale of the Wild, Wild West…but sometimes, I guess, truth is stranger than fiction.

Michael Stewart, the Citizen Kane style emperor of much of the land around the Playa, freely admits that he deliberately set fire to Burning Man’s infamous Pirate-themed art car, La Contessa. He insists it was at the local Sherriff’s instigating, part of a trash removal drive.

Well, it seems poor Michael owns the biggest yacht on Lake Tahoe, the Sierra Rose, a $7 million illegal leviathan complete with hot tub, granite fireplaces, and heli pad. At least, he used to own…now, through some mysterious twist of fate, said yacht now lies underneath said lake.

Now, Burners.Me would never accuse some Godfather-like mogul figure who openly admits to torching art cars, and has been involved in suspicious burnings of the homes of little old ladies, of insurance fraud. Nor would we think that some Mad Max inspired rabid hippies, would ever try to seek “Playa justice” outside of the Nevada court system. No, no, no! More likely, this was all just one or two big, innocent, mistaken accidents. The proximity in dates of the ship sinking, and the Burning Man trial happening, is just one of those wacky coincidences that spring up in life every now and then. They can’t be explained, other than they’re definitely not any kind of conspiracy. The common defense of the conspirator is “there’s no such thing as conspiracy theories – and you’re an uneducated buffoon if you think any different”.

Nothing to see here, move along please. Your insurance check is in the mail…