Cate Twining-Ward just wrote a scathing and hilarious “Modern Love” op-ed in the New York Times Style section.
I used to be the type of person who enjoyed dating in New York City. A summer afternoon rendezvous perhaps, one that begins with the smell of sticky sidewalks and Aperol and ends with the cheerful patter of synchronized footsteps.
Instead, I have been subjected, time and again, to Burning Man — specifically, to men who feel the festival experience has imbued them with esoteric meaning, a purpose which they never seem able to fully articulate.
I ask this sincerely: Am I the only one in the city being lectured on dates about Burning Man?
Not to be confused with post-festival passion or the harmless “Were you at Burning Man?” inquiry. I’m talking about the drawn-out and increasingly predictable “How Burning Man changed me” speech that inevitably ends with the sentiment: “If you haven’t been, you just don’t get it.”
Cate talks about a range of dating experiences involving Burning Man enthusiasts, for example:
Not long ago, I agreed to meet a seemingly normal non-Burner stranger at an Upper West Side speakeasy. His profile was desert-free, and the frosty season provided some assurance that there would be no mention of the upcoming summer festivities.
Everything was going decently well until I noticed his feet — which were bare. Bare as in he was not wearing shoes or socks. It was February.
His explanation? After attending Burning Man, he had committed to building a new routine based on the “authentic actions” he had learned there, one aspect of which included running to work (at a hedge fund) barefoot. [Source: NYT]
The author has had quite enough of Instagram Burners putting their playa pics on dating apps:
Bleak flashbacks to the many skipped Hinge profile pictures of men standing, hips thrust, in ski goggles and without shirts fluttered in and out of view
The environmental argument is one I find especially bizarre, given the famously negative planetary impact the festival has.
Wasn’t it just last year when hundreds of protesters demanded that private jets, single-use plastics and the burning of propane gas be banned? And might we be forgetting acknowledgment of the Summit Lake Paiute Tribe, whose original territory includes Black Rock Desert, where Burning Man is held?
…I asked why he picked pictures of himself at Burning Man for his dating profile.
“I’ve always seen including one as signaling, ‘I’m up for adventures,’” he said.
Two years later, “No Burners” is a trending prompt on Hinge, a fad of which I’m highly supportive.
[Source: NYT]
Her impression of Burner culture, the year round expression of the Ten Principles that needs your donation immediately, is that it encourages “a toxic spiritual superiority”:
My software developer date described his own lavish accommodation to me in detail: a decorated campground powered by propane so that music, air conditioning and light shows could run 24 hours a day.
“I’m curious to know your thoughts on unlimited generator use in respect to principal eight,” I said, out loud this time. I knew I sounded like a jerk, but the hypocrisy was deafening.
These reflections come with no self-prescribed Kumbaya. I am all for promoting nature connectedness, artistic expression and the occasional psychedelic drug. But I can’t help but feel discouraged by this wave of first-date virtue signaling. It encourages a toxic spiritual superiority, one with no basis in reality.
[Source: NYT]
Read the full article at the New York Times.
We urgently need your gift now! Gifting is one of the Tin Principles, look it up! If you don’t give generously we won’t be able to keep up the toxic spiritual superiority for 12 months of the year so you can have 1 week of partying. After all, “the world needs Burning Man now more than ever”.
See also: Vox: Burning Man’s climate protestors have a point
