Douchebag Burner Advocates Class War [Update]

The people next to you have an RV. Does that make it OK to steal their shit?

Obviously not, unless you’re an asshole. Which David Kiss clearly is. Not only to commit the acts he describes below, but then to go on to pen an article about it. And not only to write the article, but to post it all over Facebook.

Since when did the Tin Principles give Burners an excuse to ignore the basic moral conduct of goodness towards your fellow Burners?

 


 

written by David Kiss:

It’s been difficult to ignore the articles and discussions regarding the “plug and play” or “turnkey” billionaire camps in the weeks leading up to Burning Man this year. It was especially difficult to ignore them for me, as I’d camped at around 8:20 and L, right down the street from them.

As the week wore on and I got comfortable in my neighborhood, I couldn’t help but notice the billionaire camps, not just because of their million-dollar RVs and rows of tractor trailers parked so closely together, in a clear message for outsiders to stay out, but also because of the vibe I got as I rode down K street. It had a very different vibe than the rest of Black Rock City. There was no friendly interaction on the street. There was none of that community feeling.

There were plenty of impressive and elaborate “front yards” and art installations just beckoning to the curious burner to check out, yet all were empty.  I didn’t feel welcome. I kinda got the feeling that these were just there to look good, for lip service, maybe even as a subtle competition amongst these wealthy elite, come to the desert to get their taste of Burning Man.

My own opinion on these camps is this: if you can afford to hire coordinators, “sherpas”, and chefs,  rent movie trailer portapotties, live in a million-dollar RV, etc., then do it, by all means! If you’re giving someone a job, enabling them to pay their rent and feed their families, that’s amazing. If I were a billionaire, I’d probably do the same.

But be involved in the community. Don’t just write a check supporting an art project. Get your hands dirty. Engage. Get off your Segway and ride a bike, struggle in the soft playa sand, walk into other camps, and talk to people. Certainly don’t build a camp that is meant to keep people out.

 

One morning, after a particularly insane night of dancing and exploring, I wearily rode my bike down L street towards my camp with my friend. And then I noticed it. A sign that said “Service Entrance”, decorated in a burner-y motif. Service Entrance? Are they for real? I suddenly felt like I was backstage at a “real” music festival.

In a sudden fit of anger, I decided to steal the sign. Fuck it, I thought, if these guys are gonna have a fucking service entrance, they should expect their sign to be vandalized.

I yanked it off the trailer it was loosely attached to, and strode off, dragging it behind me like some sort of cross.

I got a few feet down the block before I heard someone yelling. Huffing towards me was a fat, rich-looking guy who was clearly not used to being defied. Spittle flying, he yelled at me that he was going to get me arrested, and that I’d better put that sign back immediately.

Now, I have a real problem with authority, so I laughed in his face and said, “Really?! You really can’t understand why someone might want to take this sign?! What do YOU care anyway!” He continued to yell, and talk to me as if he was king and I his servant.

At this point I changed my tone and tactic, and attempted to have a normal conversation with him. Here was my chance to engage with someone so different than me, and perhaps we’d both get something good out of this encounter. Maybe I could get him to see the ridiculousness of this, maybe he could get me to understand something here. Boy was I wrong. Dude proceeds to grab my bike, and proclaim that I could keep the sign and he’d keep the bike. This actually seemed like a good deal to me, and I laughed at the absurdity of the situation as we both started walking off.

At this point we’re interrupted by a young burner-looking dude wearing a radio. He manages to get rich guy to walk away, and then explains that this sign is here for safety reasons, and asks me politely to leave the sign. I do that, grab my bike and we walk away.

I couldn’t believe that these people couldn’t see the humor in what had happened, couldn’t understand that if you’re going to build a camp with a fucking service entrance at Burning Man, someone might be tempted to steal your precious sign which kinda symbolizes everything that is wrong with what you’re doing. So I walked back and grabbed the sign again. I was intent on taking that sign, putting it in my camp front yard, and burning it at some point.

I get about a block away, when a white pickup truck tears up, and the young burner-looking guy gets out, followed by a mean-looking security-type dude with a murderous glint in his eye. I look at both of them and can actually visualize my face getting clocked by this dude as he drags me through the dust.

“Do you understand why I’m taking this sign? Don’t you realize how you guys come off?”, I say.

This dude looks at me and says that he understands and that he’s a long-time burner. He then goes off on a nearly ten-minute rant listing all the reasons why this camp “isn’t like the other plug and play camps.” He talks about how much money the people in his camp donate to art cars and art projects. He mentions that him and his wife make “artisanal” something or other in the hills above San Francisco. He tells me that they’ve sponsored an art piece in the deep playa that has allowed an artist to have her first piece of an art at Burning Man. “Her first!”  He explains that there are people like the angry rich guy in this camp that haven’t been to Burning Man before and don’t fully get it yet.

I tuned him out very quickly as he went on and on, because I realized that he was really talking to himself to make himself feel better about working for these people, perverting the very ideas of Burning Man. I let him rattle on until he exhausted the topic, thanked him for explaining himself to me, that yes, I now understood why their camp was sooo important to Burning Man, and rode off. I knew he was a lost cause and I wasn’t interested in getting a beating over a damn sign.

And now I propose an art piece for next year: Camp Douchebag; a camp located on the open playa near 10:00 and L; a towering, wooden facade of RVs, trucks, giant generators, and abstract art, complete with wooden Segways and a bar staffed by people that studiously ignore you. If you can manage to get inside the piece, by climbing up and into it or maybe by getting in via the “service entrance”, you’ll find rows of pre-curated costumes, “Sherpa’s”, a chef preparing artisanal food, and perhaps a group of models that have been paid to come to Burning Man.

There seems to be real dilemma for the Burning Man organization regarding what to do about these plug and play camps. Well this is my solution. Bring it out front and center, stick it in everyone’s faces, and then…BURN it.


Back to Burners.Me writing now.

Radical judgement, radical narcissism, radical entitlement.

He had to look at a sign? Someone call this guy a Waambulance:

waambulance

In an entire city built on Gifting, what sort of person feels the need to steal? And what, did he think they would just go down to Home Depot and get a new sign?

I’m still trying to get my head around how someone can justify something like this to themselves, let alone go and boast about it to others. The other Burners even tried to explain things to him, but in his arrogance their words were beneath his high and mighty ears. Listen to him – “I was like Jesus with my cross”. No you weren’t…”bro”.

The difference between this city and Beverly Hills, is it is made up of tens of thousands of RVs. Located in the stinking hot, dry and dusty desert, Black Rock is one of the largest RV cities in the world. RVs that are in remote locations for weeks at a time need to be serviced. Otherwise biohazards and outbreaks can occur. Service trucks need a road to get inside the camps, so that their hoses can reach the tanks. There needs to be a way to indicate to Burners not to pitch tents or dump their bikes on that road. Radical self reliance: make a sign. A clever way to make things easier for everyone.

Basically this dickhead is saying “it’s a city, and people steal shit in cities, so there. I’m a poor loser, so they deserved it”.

How the fuck does he know if people in a camp down the road from him “engaged” or “got their hands dirty”?

Here’s what Star Star actually did:

Noah:

I got the scoop this year on what [Star Star] are about and it did somewhat ease my concerns about this particular slice of richie-richness at burning man. First and foremost this camp does contribute. All week they host live circus, music, and dance performances from some top notch Bay area talent on some of the most amazing mobile circus rigging you are likely to see anywhere, let alone at Burning Man. These are come-one come-all events. I’ve never seen a plug and play offer anything even close to that level of gift. Then I found out about the structure of the Camp. No one pays to camp there. One person pays for everything. It is a complete gift.

And here’s the description of their Theme Camp, which was there in the guide for any Burner who wanted to read, rather than vandalize:

Star Star – Live Music – Movement, Dance, Yoga classes daily. Lively shows and aerial performance throughout burn week on our gorgeous rustic stage with full daytime shade. Kick one back and come shake your business at the Star Star Roadhouse!
Hometown: All Over

Although some Burners seemed to support the actions, I’m not going to promote those trolls by sharing. It was on the snark group, so perhaps they weren’t being serious. But some serious Burners were:

Burner Marcus:

“Service Entrance” signs are pretty normal at most large theme camps and villages. As someone who seems to take pleasure in stealing other people’s shit, you seem pretty qualified to be a member of “camp douchebag.” I hope they press charges now that you’ve admitted that you stole something and only left it behind when you got chased down by the owners.

Burner Kristin:

Death Guild Thunderdome has a “Service Entrance” that we gate off with an iron fence and only open for pump trucks and our art cars. It’s there because we scrape together enough dough to have our own potties which people break into our camp to try and use, and because people don’t seem to understand that we run a performance art installation and our camp is where we, you know, camp. Running a camp on the Esplanade is a pain in the ass, because we get a fuck ton of drugged out hippies who think that walking into someone’s camp (we don’t have anything in our camp except our personal shit – if you want to interact hang out at our bar or come to dome fights) is the “burning man” thing to do. I personally hate the idea of walled off plug and play camps, but they’re out in the boonies and in general, if you want to hang out in the boonies with your paid staff and your professional chef, go for it. The idea that anybody’s camp (or their stuff) should be open for your use just because it’s there is ridiculous. Don’t steal shit. Stealing shit makes you a douchebag...I feel that people think rich people are going to edge out less-rich people. I’m unemployed and the only reason I was able to go is because I scraped together my budget for te burn when I was still employed – including my ticket, my 14 days there (7 days working, 7 days playing/working – DGTD is a working vacation for sure) my budget was $700. But stealing their shit is lame. It’s the lowest form of “pranking” – if you’re going to prank someone, make it funny. Hang out outside their camp and offer “star maps” or something. Take a megaphone and offer “advice” to people leaving (“Turn back now! It’s not safe out here!”). If you’re going to be an asshole, be a FUNNY asshole.

death-guild-thunderdome

 

Burner Chris:

1st off, the guy stole a sign to something that had nothing to do with him and wasn’t effecting anything about his burn other then what he let it effect. 2nd, most every large camp on the Playa and a lot of the mid and smaller size ones have a service entrance. If you brought an RV, did you not create a lane or a way for the RV pump trucks to reach your grey and dark tank outlets ? Service entrance. Most of the large Esplanade camps made roads that go deep in their sea of RV’s…. Service entrance. The only difference I see is this camp made a sign that said it. So what. It didn’t say Private Property, Keep out.

Burner Tobias:

I like the idea of the satirical art project, but you handled this lamely. It seems like you had written them off from the beginning and refused to listen to anything they said. I bet those art projects and cars sure appreciated the donations!

Peter Hirshberg, who has been promoted as one of the Founders of Burning Man, saw this as a clever political statement, a throwback to the good old Cacophony Society days:

You missed the entire point of his art and reaction. He saw this faux nonparticipatory behavior in the hermetically sealed camp and pranked them. Sounds like cacophony society/ clever art behavior to me. The point of his piece wasn’t that he took a sign, it was a contemplation on this new form of not quite getting it fortress community- making

You bet I missed the point of his “piece”. I certainly got the point of the theft, and being a public nuisance. Is bike stealing an acceptable form of protest too, Peter? “oh look at that bike, it’s decorated so much, they must be rich! I deserve to take that. Stealing is an art“.

If they had gone and stolen signs from First Camp, the protest might have meant something – because it was directed at the decision makers who have socially engineered our culture to be this way. A civilization is not built on the principle of “rob thy neighbor”. Making life harder for RV dumps for camps that put on free circus performances is not true to the Burner spirit in any way. If that kind of thing is acceptable at a Cacophony Society event, then take your theft and imitations of Christ to one of those.

Burner Noah:

I can’t believe I’m defending big money at burning man, but here’s a short list: Caliope, Mayan Warrior, Star-Star, Robot Heart…all huge money art or art cars. all amazing. And yes Embrace was also amazing and mayb e had more heart but nonetheless you can’t say millionaire brought nothing to burning man…

Yes it is all inclusive. Yes it is plug and play, and yes it is free for those camping there. On top of that the staff are paid decently and given tickets to the burn and have to work minimal hours during the event though I’m sure set up and breakdown are hellish with that level of infrastructure I don’t know how I feel about the “Service entrance” sign, that’s just out of place, but I guarantee you there are smaller poorer theme camps phoning it in and offering far less to the Burning man community than Star-Star. Plug and play theme camps that offer nothing to the public really should be denied placement. Star-Star, as much as you may resent the divide between rich and poor deserves to be there. One man has put a mountain of resources into giving something amazing to burning man and that in my estimation balances the scales given that radical self reliance is utterly and totally dismissed by the 30 guests that camp there.

Also, Our theme camp (which has a budget somewhere in the neighborhood of $6k, in other words theming on a shoestring), while not gated, is definitely set up to discourage randoms from walking around our back lot. We have a front of house and chill space that is welcome to all, but would really rather not have drugged out weirdos and undercover cops roaming and sniffing about our housing. Radical inclusion only goes so far. Where is the line? Am I expected to let strangers walk into my yurt open my cooler and drink my beer uninvited because radical inclusion?

There’s nothing stupid about security and privacy, in a party with tens of thousands of people roaming the city on illegal substances. Clearly, there are thieves and vagabonds about.

Acacia:

You’re not a real burner unless you’re sleeping in a rickety lean-to and subsisting on beef jerky and pickle juice. All of these “Shade structure” and “Sturdy tent” wannabes are ruining the burn

Steven:

As in favor of class warfare as I am out in the everyday world I call this sort of thing bull shit!
If anything having the ultra-rich and politically conservative or libertarian attend and spending at least some time amongst the rest of us has a chance of bringing about just a little enlightenment. Inclusivity was one of the first things that drew me to burning man getting together working together with people you would never see let alone spend time with in the default world.
After the first year doesn’t the second year always bring out an even greater investment of time and money in preparations, or maybe joining a theme camp? Elaborate contraptions for making showers, water evaporator, and silt filters. Then there are those that get into food prep and elaborate meals, for a number of years the camp I was with put together a full thanks giving turkey feast for the camp members in the middle of the week. While we made living in the desert easier and more fun we also provided a better stocked full serves Bar for our neighbors and patrons theme nights a mutant vehicle, every year more. And yes the actual camping space was out of bounds to anyone who wasn’t invited. The more people can afford to spend the more they spend and the is the true burner way,…

Teri:

Stealing is stealing, period. Just because he’s stealing from a plug-n-play asshat camp doesn’t make it right. Jeebus, people, I live my week in a tent and that doesn’t make me any holier or burnier than thou because I’m not in an RV. It’s not class warfare, it’s BS douchebaggery.

Brett:

david kiss your a fucking douche bag!!!! Stealing and vandalism is just that… Regardless how much $ someone has, your actions bring you down to trailer trash. Im no billionaire but i would not associate with someone that wants to spray there negativity on the world. If you dont like what plug and plays, go spend your time with other amazing people on the playa. Black Rock is a city that is open to all, poor, rich, all nationalities, races and everyone in between. Fucking get over it!

Erik:

I find it funny that people haven’t realized that there has always been a TON of money at burning. Theme camps aren’t cheap. Art cars, not cheap. The Man and Temple, not cheap and money spent literally for burning too. In the end, you make the burn what YOU want. If one is telling someone else how to burn, that person is in the wrong.

Welcome to the civilization of Burning Man: Millenial Edition. Where we protest against BMOrg’s policies by taking it out on each other.

 

Embrace Environmental Sustainability

embrace burn 2014

photo: Mortesha, facebook

from webcast embrace burn

http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/52028165

The burn starts at 6:45. That blue stuff looks gnarly – glue?

Interesting that they burned it in the day time. Looking at the stream now, it is whiteout conditions and also looks very windy, so perhaps another storm is expected.

MOOP collection, post-event

MOOP collection, post-event

The Embrace creators were originally looking for a permanent home for their structure, but it seems the MOOP Monster may have forced it to burn.

160,000 lbs of wood was burned. The structure cost $266,000, of which $52,000 came from Kickstarter. Outraged gender-fluids took to BMIR to complain that Alpha looked too masculine, and Omega looked too feminine. They look like big artworks to me, not actual people. People have arms and legs, more like that big Man Person thing they keep showing.

Some comments from Burners on Facebook:

Bill: This is beautiful and touching… and i know im an ass for thinking/saying this- but I can’t help but think about all the pollution from all of this… Oh well… carry on!

Electra: It is beautiful but incredibly irresponsible.

Michael: Bill, keep it in proportion; any decent forest fire is multiples of this, and you can’t make experiential omelettes without breaking some eggs.
Electra: Michael, I’m guessing you don’t have children.
CptnSmashy: Pollution? Irresponsible? You people call yourselves ‘BURNERS” for fuck’s sake. Burning Man is not some kind of hippy love carbon neutral environmentalist unicorn fart gathering namaste dust worshiping ritual, it is organized chaos and they burn shit. LOTS of shit.

Christi: I get the sentiment, but the CO2 emissions from actually burning things at Burning Man is just the icing on the tip of the iceberg. I’d love to see people commit to a lower-carbon burn in all the other ways– transportation, how much stuff gets brought out, how much excess stuff is bought and thrown away, etc. It would be interesting to do the math and see what kind of a reduction would be needed to “pay for” the burns. On a cumulative basis (x pounds CO2/70,000 people), I’d bet it wouldn’t take all that much to bring the math in line, as long as everyone (including all those Techexecs) did their share. C’mon PDiddy- ditch the jet and join the rest of the dirt hippies in their tents & shade structures!!

They did the math in 2007, for the Green Man. See here.

Haysteev: My opinion is that the huge expense (500K in this case, 150-300K for Man or Temple), gas and manpower to harvest wood around the globe, the volunteering, materials and fundraising to build, to then truck it out to the desert to burn for 6 days….is wasteful and I feel like Burners should be more highly considerate of the state of the planet and humanity. What could burners have done with that money and volunteering energy? OR…how about disassemble it and move it from city to city, to inspire other people off-playa? Isn’t that what BMORG wants to do? To spread BM culture off-playa? Lead by example.

Amber: they didnt know if they were going to allow this to burn because the wood wasn’t really the right wood to burn.They finally decided to burn it because it would be moopier taking it apart than burning it…it wasnt the wood burning it was that it had glue in it and it wasnt “approved”wood…i can’t remember what type of wood it was…one of the engineers at Ill Ville told me when we were on their art car…but I was drunk so i dont remember

We’ll let Anastasia have the last word: This is just reflection of our entire civilization, people, deal with it

What do you think, Burners? If, like 75% of us think, there is room in the world for more Burning Man-esque events, should we try to make them environmentally sustainable? Or should they always be temporary, wasteful, impermanent, symbolizing this ancient ritual ceremony of death-and-rebirth?

 

What Dreams May Come – Part II: The Introduction

[Part I]

The people have spoken. And it’s as I predicted: most think there is room in the world for more than one Burning Man-style event.

So far in our poll, about three quarters are in favor of something new. A fifth think there can only ever be Burning Man in the world, and that’s it. Even the Regionals can never compete. For these people it’s capped at 70,000, so inevitably will become more exclusive. Every year, more Veterans can’t go, which this group sees as a good thing. A different group, only 4%, think the future is in the Regionals controlled by BMOrg. I think it would be fair to call that segment of our community the Kool Aid drinkers.

We’ll see what happens when more Burners return from the Playa, maybe they’ll go back through this blog and read this, and maybe they’ll vote differently. Somehow, though, I doubt it.

Burning Man is a festival of creativity first, and art second. Creativity could be MacGyvering a tool to solve a problem in the middle of nowhere. It could be figuring out a way to get that hot girl back to your tent. It could be working out how to get water when you run out and your survival is at stake.

Whatever form it takes, creativity thrives on freshness. And Burning Man is becoming stale. If it has jumped the shark, then we’re the shark.

And we’re swimming around a great big ocean, looking for more good times.

“Enough bashing Burning Man!”, cry the readers. “What are we going to do about it? Do you have a vision for something better, or can you only criticize others?”

Good question. So permit me this long answer, which is going to require several parts. It takes a few iterations before a vision becomes simple to explain. And this isn’t just about my vision – I want to hear your ideas too. If we create something together, what’s that going to look like?

I have put a lot of work into this blog in the last 2.5 years, and if it’s going to continue – go to the next level, even – then it’s going to take a lot more work. More than one person can do. I’m going to need allies, Burners and Camps and tribes that share a vision of trying something new. Of doing it better. We will risk failure, and the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. The prize would be the preservation of the awesome bits of global Burner culture, and encouraging it to evolve in a direction to help the planet as well as ourselves.

Forget Leave No Trace – I want to Leave It Better.

If we’re to imagine something wonderful together, Burners, then it’s important to me that you understand where I’m coming from. If there’s a war between the inclusive Burners and the Burnier-Than-Thous, then I want to make it clear which side I’m on. It’s the side of the Burners. The rebels, the freaks, the cyberpunks, the nomads, the international adventurers. If you’re reading this blog now, then you’re probably not at Burning Man, and maybe some of you are interested. Or you’re back from Burning Man, which means you’re definitely interested.

Think of this as About Burners.Me, the Extended Edition.


Buckminster Fuller is a hero of mine. Up there with Tesla as one of the greatest scientists who ever lived. He once said:

“You never change things by fighting the existing reality.
To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.”
R. Buckminster Fuller

I have no interest in fighting Burning Man. They can do their thing, and we’ll keep writing about it. It’s definitely grown to become a big event on the annual Burner calendar, like a week-long Halloween. There is plenty of other time in the year for more things to go on in more places. As Burner culture spreads, the one event becomes less and less significant overall. 75% of Burners say there is room for something more. I think there’s a great deal of room.

 


 

This new space we’re dreaming up needs a name. To get started I’m going to call it Burnland. Think Disneyland, but a cool one for Burners, not the cheesy one for kids with its Mickey Mouse Club spewing out pop idols.

I see Burner culture as a movement. It’s a big, worldwide movement, bigger than me, bigger than you, bigger than Burning Man, bigger than all of us. It’s the future, manifesting into reality through art and music and imagination and inspiration. Through skill and connections, through access to capital and audience. Makers and designers and inventors and artists and promoters and performers.

The section of the movement I’m interested in for Burnland, is not the same as Burning Man’s demographic. Ours has members. If you’re in, you’re in – you’ve made that choice. You want to be a part of Burnland. Sure, you can invite your guests to come play with you, even if they’re not members. Some events are members only, some are open to the public. You can check it out casually, no strings attached. Just buy a temporary member ship, for a night or a week. You don’t have to be “acculturated” or “brainwashed” to attend. But no-one is part of “we” until they freely and explicitly choose to be.

Membership does not have to be unlimited, and open to all comers. There is no need for grand ambitions, or to take over the world. Let’s just try to make something awesome, something that is simple and appealing and scaleable. Something we can teach others to replicate in their home towns and also profit from. Something that the community can all benefit from together. Something that can give back and Leave It Better.

Burnland is something I’ve been envisioning for some time. I guess you could say it’s my Burning Man art project, the thing that I was inspired to dream of from the first time I went out to the Black Rock Desert. Even before that, my friends and I had been doing “raver camping” in bigger, badder deserts in the Australian Outback. Creating techno micro-villages for the weekend in the middle of nowhere, with solar panels and wi-fi. In my case, glamping – I had an off-road caravan with solar-power air conditioning, formerly used by a demolitions expert working for the mining companies. It had a bathroom, a shower, and a mirrored table like it was a suite at the Clift Hotel in San Francisco. I towed it with a 14-seater offroad mini-bus called an Oka. We could go anywhere, and we did.

If you ever get the chance, go to an Eclipse party. Many of the people on the Eclipse circuit (yes, there is one, just like there’s a festival circuit) go to Burning Man too. It’s a great time, and a magical event to experience with a crowd of 10,000+ people in the middle of nowhere.

Instead of an art car, I contracted an engineer to construct me a road-legal custom hot tub trailer. It had a gas heater and a generator which ran the whole camp as well as the pumps. We could go miles from anywhere, pump water in from a fresh mountain stream, and be partying outdoors gazing at the stars from the hot tub in 45 minutes. We had the music pumping as loud as we wanted, all night long. And we wanted it loud. I’m talking parties around 30-40 people, a small group of friends getting together for a weekend adventure. With a laser or two. Some of us would DJ, we’d drink from a cooler and sit on camping chairs around a fire. Nothing fancy.

oka

We had a really, really good time. A large amount of fun. We called it Chicken Madness.

If you think that makes me a douchebag, well, you’re entitled to your opinion, but you’re not going to be welcome at my party. Have a nice day.

 


 

Elements

Something to listen to while you read…

When I first went to Burning Man in 1998, I recognized some similar elements from our camping parties. Instead of embracing the temporary, transitory, destructive, oasis in the desert is-it-all-illusion nature of the event, Burning Man inspired me to think of permanence. There was finally a location that I could go to be me.

And what me did I want to be? How did I wanted to express my radical self? I wanted to turn my stereo on and blast my favorite tunes.

Doof Doof Doof Doof

What if there was a city, somewhere in the world, that you could go to any time you wanted, crank the music up, party, and in doing that you’re actually being friendly to all your neighbors. If you like loud music, there are not many places you can go and do that. Sure, there are places you can go and listen to the loud music of others. Mostly nightclubs. And there is your  home, where your neighbors are liable to rat you out to the police if you turn your stereo above a certain volume. Or worse – I’ve been in situations where murder was threatened over my stereo volume. Even though we’d already turned it down.

angel of deaf cartoonWhen I first went to Burning Man I thought that’s what it was, a place where everyone had gone all the way into the middle of the desert so they could do what they want without annoying the neighbors. A festival of freedom. As it has grown the imposition of ever-increasing noise restrictions, and venom towards the Sound Camps from the founders, has been pushing it away from that. Not to mention police with sniffer dogs, pulling Burners over because their bike rack blocks their license plate when they’re not even on the public roadway.

I used to live on a beautiful 300 acre woodland property in Australia. My own private forest. A famous musician lived next door, and I’d hear his parties all the time. It wasn’t doof though. No subwoofers involved. When I turned my own stereo on, the kangaroos loved it, and would come closer to the house. They’d laze around on the lawn all day listening to it, basking in the sun and feeling the beats. I never actually got a noise complaint, but one time came close. 14 police showed up at the gates to the ranch. People had complained from 2 suburbs away. I had rented 2 Funktion1 mid-range speakers and 2 subs, which would be a small system even for an art car at Burning Man. I was on the largest privately held land parcel in Melbourne, and my stereo was too loud. Where to go?

More recently, I was living on a 6 acre vineyard in Sonoma. I had no neighbors, just other vineyards. I was next to the highway, which in itself is quite noisy. My Burning Man JBL system cost me less than $3k brand new on Amazon, it plugs into a headphone jack and a 4-outlet power strip. If anyone is looking for a stereo, these great self-powered 15″ speakers are only three hundred bucks each right now.

Again, on the vineyard I never got an actual noise complaint. But it’s a small community, and some of my friends are long-time locals. Word got back to me, that people heard the music, and it was pissing them off. It wasn’t even close to full volume. I had 1 speaker and sub in the house, and 1 each outside on the deck.

I think it’s fair to say I like it loud. And I’m not the only one. And that has always been a huge drawcard of Burning Man to me. If you don’t like the music, you can go check out somewhere else with different music, or somewhere with no music. Or you can make your own. It’s open to anyone, and unlike most of the world, people who like it loud aren’t excluded. Some of this music is so good, it deserves to be turned up to 11.

So that’s got to be part of Burnland, for me – raging is a raison d’etre. It’s gonna be fucking loud, in lots of different places. Hey, there can be quiet zones too. I’m open to that. There can even be kids zones and work zones and commercial zones. But the kids and the fetish models and the naked people are not going to be mingling all together in the same spot.

The world needs more places where we can all go beserk, get crazy in a good way. Party with our hands in the air, like we just don’t care. Cast off the rules and shackles of existence, leave the day-to-day reality of our lives on hold for a little while and just have fun. A serious amount of fun.

ibiza-night

 

Principles

 

blackjack hookersI am going to propose 9 Principles, just to show we’re starting by trying to make things easier. We don’t even need that many. Everything we need can actually be summed up in a word: karma. If you understand the principle of karma, which I believe to be a fundamental force in this Universe, then you will be naturally inclined towards acting positively, with kindness and compassion towards others. You will do good things because you understand that it is in your own self-interest, as well as in everyone’s.

Of these 9 Principles, I think they are all important, but if we were to just stick to Leave It Better then Burnland will always be improving. And that’s the main thing. If anything’s going to change, it should be the way the System of Organization of the City meets the needs of its constituents efficiently, harmoniously, amusingly, and wonderfully.

There are probably others, and these should by no means be considered as final. Let’s put our heads together, and dream together of what could be. Maybe integrity should be one. Maybe goodwill, and being present.  Consider this a first cut.

 What’s In?

  1. Fun – this is light hearted, makes us laugh, the goal is to have a good time. Leave your tears at home.
  2. Abundance – With innovation and collaboration, we want those involved to flourish and prosper, and to help them if we can
  3. Leave it Better – How Can We Make This More Awesome? We prefer to build stuff than destroy things.
  4. Environment – Permaculture with Habitat Preservation. Strive to be harmonious with the earth
  5. Magic – even if we don’t know what it is, we believe there’s something. God, spirit, luck, kismet, whatever. We have a soul and our souls can connect.
  6. Consciousness Community- aware of our actions and their affect on others.We’re all in this together
  7. Listening, Learning, Teaching. Each one teach one. The Trivium: grammar, logic, and rhetoric. How to listen, how to learn, and how to respond.
  8. Love. Kindness, compassion, caring. For each other, for those less fortunate, for the earth, for the indigenous people who are custodians of the land.
  9. Transparency – open systems, open books, integrity and honesty.

What’s out?

All this shit about Radicals. “Rules for Radicals” is a guerilla warfare handbook for the political class, the “Community Organizers” like our current Dear Leader. This is the kind of stuff that was going on around UC Berkeley in the late 60’s, a time of civil unrest and racial tension. A young lawyer named Hillary Clinton was all over it, she wrote her famous thesis on it. Burning Man endorses progressive political candidates in San Francisco, as well as promoting their ties to Washington and Nevada politics. I would rather keep politics out of it. By all means, make it rad. But the radical extremists can go somewhere else. We want everyone to have a good time, you don’t have to be acculturated to an unusual way of thinking.

What else don’t we want? Haters. Broners. Nutjobs. Heavy, militarized police presence. Gangs. Sexual assault, or indeed, any assault. Bike theft. Satanists. I’m sure we can all think of plenty more. Rather than having to memorize principles, a 5-10 minute video on the sort of things we discourage should suffice.

What about tech?

Absolutely. Google founder, Billionaire Burner Larry Page is right – the tech industry needs some spaces it can experiment with new technologies, without freaking everybody out at once. I want to create those spaces, we can rent them to the tech companies and that can fund the creation of the community’s infrastructure.

I believe passionately in the ethos of the Open Source movement. I’ll be writing more on that in the coming week or so. It built the Internet, an amazing and precious gift to our civilization from the hackers. Let’s hope The Man doesn’t fuck it up for all of us with ever increasing regulations.

The Maker Movement and Burning Man have a big overlap. Fabrication is required to make these 3-dimensional art projects. Crossover skills are required. The art cars need lighting people. The lighting people need iPad interface developers. The artist needs a pyrotechnic specialist. I think that’s a great thing about Burning Man projects and camps, the way people are encouraged to collaborate on something that is a fun project with their friends, and results in something they can all do together. Why do we have to destroy it at the end, though? If something is cool, keep it there. Add to it, innovate, leave it better.

We have enough of everything already to make this community sought-after by those who want the Burner aesthetic. It’s a little bit steampunk, it’s a little bit Mad Max, it’s a little bit Agent Provocateur. You want an art car, or a fire sculpture DJ booth? Come to us. We have the space, the resources, the tools, the people, and the experience to make whatever you can dream of. And we invite others to come and make with us.

A sculpture gallery for big art could be a drawcard. So could experimental laser and LED technologies.

I have a lot of experience in business incubation and early-stage startups. Crowd-funding is radically disrupting the VC model. I see that as being a part of Burnland too. Innovation and Imagination are to be encouraged. Most start-ups need more than just money to become reality, and just like it takes a village to raise a child, a virtual community can help build a business. Just look at AirBnB…

In Burnland, commerce will be allowed, so long as it is relatively invisible. Authentication is important, I don’t want anyone to get in trouble for serving booze or smoking prescribed medication. I’m thinking wristbands is the best technology, it’s something most people get already if they’ve been to a festival. All access passes on a lanyard are kinda lame, wristbands are a collectors item for some. I liked the way they did this at the Wild Wadi waterslide park in Dubai. I’m sure there’s a high-tech way we could do it with smartphones or biometric ID as well. You can buy drinks, you can buy t-shirts, you can buy art – but no-one has to see money changing hands. The marketplace is a zone, one part of the space, not something omnipresent. Not a big souk in the middle that you are drawn to by a giant effigy. Exit through the gift shop.

Vendors can sell their wares. Artists can sell their art. Fashionistas can display their fashion. Opulence and decadence can be part of a good time had by all. That’s what being a community means, we want to support each other, keep the money in the community if we can. Tip your server. Shop locally.  We can have a big online mall to promote our community’s creations, a virtual market place. I think that most Burner artists would find a centralized gallery where they can trade their works and get commissions to be useful. We have a few on board already for this adventure, and I’m sure there are more out there who are reading this and would like to contribute to something new – and don’t mind if they make a few bucks for themselves along the way.

A rising tide lifts all boats, and if the whole community is prospering, it will just keep getting better and better. And that’s the goal. It doesn’t have to be perfect as long as it’s always improving. The best system is one that everyone can participate in, and benefit from.

 

Exclusivity

“Radical Inclusion” is the wrong principle from the start. There are 7 billion people on this planet, you have to exclude some of them. In Burning Man’s case, their 70,000 peak population limit is 0.001% of world population. 99.999% are excluded, whatever they say about inclusion.

I think better than a principle, is a rule: No Dicks. AKA Principle Number 8. With love and kindness, and all due respect, if you’re going to be a dick to others, we don’t want you at our thing. Go to Burning Man, where with Radical Inclusion the Burnier-Than-Thous will welcome you with open arms, then try to acculturate you.

Rockwall DudetteI used to own a nightclub in Melbourne, Australia, called ZoS – Zone Of Separation. I was inspired by San Francisco’s DNA Lounge, which I’d heard was started by some guys who made their money in tech; and also by my hero Sir Richard Branson, who used his club Heaven in London to ensure that his finger was always on the pulse of what the hippest people in town were into. ZoS was licensed for about 1000 people at a time, and had a 24/7 liquor license. They party pretty hard Down Under. We would get maybe 5000 through the doors every week. An armored car would show up every Monday morning, and collect six figures worth of cash. I had a private room behind a 2-way mirror, looking over the dancefloor. I could chill out, I could party with my friends and talk to them in front of the A/C, I could dance like crazy without bumping into anyone, and I could look out at my customers all happy, whistling and cheering, dancing, having a great time. Any time I wanted to get amongst the people, I could slip into the crowd relatively anonymously; if I felt like socializing, there were a variety of Zones to do that including a sumptuous VIP lounge.

The Moser Room at ZoS

The Moser Room at ZoS

I’ve been to quite a few clubs in America, and elsewhere around the world. London, Ibiza, St Tropez, Paris, Berlin, Amsterdam, Hong Kong, Singapore, Mexico City, Dubai. I had a professional interest in it, as well as a personal interest in the music. The best clubs have a vibe, the whole crowd is going off. I started out with the music I loved, but learned pretty soon that we had to cater to the crowd. And I grew to love the same music the crowd did. I’m proud of the vibe that we created in that club, the whole team of people who made it work. Generally, it’s the promoters that make the club, not the venue…and that’s something that BMOrg just doesn’t seem to get.

One thing you can’t escape from in a club, is exclusivity. If it’s full, it’s full. A famous celebrity might show up with an entourage of 20 people, and if you want to let them in, you have to find 20 people to kick out. That’s how it works, if you want to run a good, clean, above-board, by the books venue. You comply with police and fire regulations. That’s partly why I wanted to own a club, because I got sick of all the gangster ones, and thought Melbourne could use a high-quality commercially operated venue.

So if you manage to create something cool, you always have to be rejecting people. It sucks to be rejected from a club, whatever the reason. We’ve all been there. The drunker you are, the more it sucks, the more belligerent people are inclined to be. Which sucks for the club security. Membership solves all these problems, you know that you can put yourself and your friends on the guest list.

“Life’s about choosing the kinds of problems you want to have”, was one of the best pieces of advice I ever got, from a fellow Aussie who’d spent a lot of time in San Francisco as a public company CEO. I took his advice and got out of the club scene. Like most clubs, ours was hot for a few years when it first opened and then it tapered off and the crowd changed. I met many famous people and beautiful women. I got to hear some of my favorite DJs, playing on a world class sound system. As a former computer nerd, it was a bit like creating an art car for Burning Man: it made me more cool in the eyes of strangers, and gave me an excuse to mingle with people from different walks of life. Generally, though, I went there to do my own thing, and socialize with my group of friends. Melbourne is kind of clique-y like that. I didn’t need the spotlight, I didn’t need to network, and I didn’t need to make new friends. The after party was already full enough.

I sold that investment and moved to San Francisco. I wanted to go to Burning Man, not nightclubs. I wanted to dance to the same music, but be around people who inspired me, fellow wacky eccentric geniuses who loved to collaborate with lasers and fire and art cars and glowy shit and all that good stuff. People who don’t care how much money others have, because they have plenty of their own. A place where being cool meant more than spraying randoms with $16,000 bottles of Louis Roederer.

Burning Man today is facing issues of Exclusivity. As much as they want to claim Radical Inclusion is dear to their hearts, it’s a promise that’s impossible for them to deliver on. Not everybody can go, so that means some have to get bounced away. Whether by Guest List or Algorithm or police roadblocks, it’s getting harder and harder to get into Burning Man.

So I’d rather embrace the inevitable, and use exclusivity as a good thing to make the crowd better. If the event is smaller, and not everyone can go, then you get to be selective. You can recognize your regulars, and let them back in. You can learn who the dicks are, and put them on the NO list.

Membership is the way to go. Look at Burning Man’s only real competitor for billionaires and their sherpas, Bohemian Grove. You have to be invited to join by existing members, there is a waiting list, you have to pay. They’ve been going strong since the 1870’s, and you might be surprised how many Burners are also Grovers. I know at least half a dozen.

Is it elitist? Sure is. No dicks. Or in their case, “Weaving spiders come not here”.

Membership gives people a reason to behave civilly towards their fellow club members. And if they misbehave, the club has a mechanism to eject them.

Burnland’s  community could throw larger events, open to lots of different audiences. Camps could throw their own parties, or the whole city could come together to throw a 50,000 person party any time you want. One night could be BDSM fetish-themed, at another time you could have an all ages event. Just showing up to a party once, doesn’t immediately make you a part of its community – let alone an owner of it. You’ve got to do something, contribute, or at the very least, buy your way in. Earn your place, if you didn’t get invited directly.

In the world I’m dreaming of, Burners can have a say, their vote can be counted. Building temporary cities is a chance to experiment with all kinds of political and social technologies. Let’s try Direct Democracy. Let’s try crowd-funding led civic budget allocations, and a tax system that lets you choose where the money gets spent. Let’s try Open Source government.

Right now there is an anti-rich, anti-tech backlash firestorm swirling around Burning Man. It reminds me of Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged, where society turns on the rich and then collapses in on itself when all the talent fucks off somewhere they’re more appreciated. Read the comments in the online forums, some people are ferociously passionate about hating on the rich and wishing they all left Burning Man.

Well, I don’t want our community to include those haters. Rich people, you’re going to be welcome at Burnland. Bring all the sherpas you want, and if you want to outdo the person next to you with amazing art and extravagant entertainment, please: be my guest. You’re exactly the kind of Burner we want at Burnland, someone who has resources at their disposal to facilitate new and unqiue forms of self expression. That’s part of what the art is, the inspirational and (for some) aspirational element. What could be done? What dreams may come?

I want to hang out with my friends, and meet their friends. A community of makers, and doers, and shakers. That’s who my friends already are, and I’m sure many of the readers of this blog who I haven’t met personally yet are in this community too. Some of my friends are broke-ass, some of them are very wealthy, so what? That doesn’t define them to me. There’s much more to life than just money, money is simply a means to any number of different ends. What’s important to me is that my friends are all pretty positive people, none of them are haters. They’re good hearted, smart and funny and inspiring to be around. Everyone has something to offer, and Burnland should be about recognizing contributions and gratitude.

It doesn’t need to be 70,000 people. It doesn’t even need to be 10,000 people. Quality over quantity. I don’t need to meet every person in the world, but I would like to meet other interesting, well travelled, fun people. That’s about the extent of “networking” that I have done in 11 Burning Mans. And I have made some amazing friendships out of it.

If we’re going to make the awesomest community we can, then I want to do it with the best people: the individuals and Camps that would come to our location(s) and participate. Whether it’s to visit and check out a party, or a destination to drive their art car around at sometimes, or somewhere they can take some space and store their stuff and who knows, maybe build their own permanent camp that they visit regularly throughout the year.

Who?

Burners.You